I ask God, "Why am I still alive?"
With His gentle and Fatherly voice, He replied, "Because I love you."

Why the wall remain untouch till recent?

God places different ppl in our lives at different period of our lives. He has His purposes; He put ppl into our lives to give you support, to let you give support, to brighten your life, to strenghten you or to comfort you. And every encounter is different. The ultimate reason is because He loves you. =)

God is always embracing us with His love; His Love cannot be measured instantly....
Instant love means ppl love you for a period of time and die off... But God love is different.

Was studying hard for my upcoming midterm and suddenly started praising God.
Praised God for His love for me.
How amazing it is!
He knows my dream, he knows how much I wanted to enter Uni since young. He knows everything. Though my results wasn't as good as compared to others, but He still provide me with Uni. I wasn't good in sec, everyone probably think I'll end after Poly. Though I wasn't the material for Uni but He still provide. It's tough now in Uni, really tough, but i know He will see me through like He see me through secondary and poly.

Though I always dun do well even I really put alot of effort, but he still provide Uni for me. That's him. He see you through and till the end. You may not feel His presence but He is always by your side. That's Him. No matter how we fail Him, He will never fail us. That's Him.... That's my Lord, Jesus.

Maddy

Thankgiving to 2007

Thankgiving to 2007

2007 was a yr of sufferings and it had nt been gd for me. Despite the downs, there were a few ups as well. As the saying goes: God wont give us what we cant bear.

In e first half of e yr, I was struggling to do well in the working society; trying to cope and handle with the politics that is a well known thing in e office. As a newbie, nt everyone was as mercy as they shld be, but God is gd, He also ppl that are gd as well. The best thing is, God love everyone even they r gd or bad; the reason is, He has to love what He has created. God provided christian colleagues to light my life, seniors that are willing to guide and also provide a person that is dear to me so that i can hang on a little longer. I thank God for Angeline who really help me up alot in the office and also help me to grow in God alittle more. Being a working adult is a totally diff experience and I really thank God for tt.

For those that jus happened to pop by my blog, I wanna say to u is tt, do let the past be the past, anything tt was unpleasant leave it with 2007. Forgive those that had done wrong to u. For God says: Do nt judge and you will nt be judged. Do nt condemn, and u will nt be condemned. Forgive, and u will be forgiven. ---Luke 6:37. For God so love me that He can forgive the sin that i Have made, I want to let go all disappointments and wanna announce tt I have forgiven those that wasnt tt nice to me. Nevertheless, these were e ppl tt brought spice to my life. I do sincerely thank you.

God is always good!!! He is always a good organiser, He always has his timing for his plans; As I will always say, "GOd has a good plan for our future!"

I was so disappointed when I was rejected by NIE in yr 2006 for the 2007 intake, despite attaining a gd result in poly. Disappointed with God but He is surely glad tt im still believing in Him. Wanna shout to God that He will always be my God. In the mid of yr 2007, I received a confirmation letter from Uni. Nt 1 local Uni but 2.

Before stepping into the Uni life, God knows how much I would like to help up with the troubled teens and I was given an opportunity to help up in a gals' home. The experience was gd, an eye opener, and definitely learned alot from the friends there and also the gals.

Tough things are always all ard us. The phrase in Uni wasnt a smooth sailing one too. It all started even from the start. I felt so intimated by those that are younger n definitely much more clever students. Confident level was down to the seabed. I tried to pull up myself but to no avail. One thing that I can testify was that without confident things really will nt be that smooth sailing. The only thing now is to really gain back my confident.

Projects came rolling in even from the starts of the term and had v close deadlines, and what the profs teaches in class are like totally aliens while some JC graduates are like their best frens. Tons of books had to be read for self study purposes. The most stressful thing was, students keep saying GSR were fully booked and students grapping their lunch boxes rushing to their destinations.

The only thing that I do is... GOD PLS HELP ME!!!

As a young christian like me, I was pulling my ear long, hoping to switch on my 'Godwave', so that I will know how to handle the situation. God was gracious to me, He provided christian friends so that we can worship God in sch and taking a breath from the busy school life. I will never say e term was easy but I will proudly proclaim tt I have survived becos God see me thru. Some ppl do nt understand why I was so stressed up but He knows. "...God knows everythings" -- 1 John 3:20.

For this, I would like to thank God for ppl like michelle and my LTB mates. They are like the ppl that God has planted them into my path. And definitely my parent that tried so hard to understand my hardship, church friends that always keep me in prayers and my supporter that God has ask him to guide me to be a lady for God.

God is always Good. We may nt knows the reason for the thing that had happened ard us, but we will soon realise God is always good to us. The year was tough but I had a wonderful provided hoilday to sum up the year.

God, there are too much thing that I wan to thank you but tt will be countless, but what has been given to me, let's it be praises back to u. God, let submit myself to in the 2008, so that I can be mighty used by U.

Child of God- Maddy Chan

God make my day in school

After for weeks and months of struggles in school... Today is my happiest day. When things seen like out of control and physically drained, God brighten the moment once again. Seeing someone being save and coming back to the Lord just make me feel so charged up again. All those sufferings are worth it just to wait for this day. Thanks God for putting me in SMU for a purpose and to know friends that worth to mix around. So blessed. Father i pray that along this journey in SMU let me learn to depend on you for strength and the choices i make. God, let me be drawn closer to you. Live is really more interesting to have God around. Thank you, God. Father, you has made my day.

Always the child of God

First day of school

First day of school lei.... OMG! So nervous la! it's 2.15pm now, waiting for lesson at 3.30pm. Wondering who will be in my class? Wonder how the lecturer will be like. Is it going to be tough? Lots of thoughts floating across my mind. Actually suppose to read up e lecture note but im seriously too nervous. The only thing i can do is to blog this out and chat with my oji-san only.... But I really thank God for e opporunity to be in SMU. I reakon it will be a tough 4yrs study but im more confident tt God will be with me. Stay tune for More news is to be coming up later...

Who am I

Who am I?

That the Lord of all the earth, Would care to know my name, Would care to feel my hurt.

Who am I?

That the bright and morning star, Would choose to light the way, For my ever wondering heart.

Not because of who I am.

But because of what you've done.
Not because of what I've done.

But because of who you are.

I am a flower quickly fading,

Here today and gone tomorrow.

A wave tossed in the ocean, A vapor in the wind.

Still you hear me when I'm calling,

Lord you catch me when I'm falling,

And you told me who I am.

I am yours.

I am yours.

Who am I?

That the eyes that see my sin Would look on me with love And watch me rise again

Who am I?

That the voice that calm the sea, Would call out through the rain, And calm the storm in me.

Not because of who I am.

But because what of you've done.

Not because of what I've done.

But because of who you are.

I am a flower quickly fading,

Here today and gone tomorrow.

A wave tossed in the ocean, A vapor in the wind.

Still you hear me when I'm calling,

Lord you catch me when I'm falling,

And you told me who I am.

I am yours.

I am yours.

Father at this v pt when im breaking down, you show me who I am. I am Yours!

The Art of Patience

Terrible Morning... Trying to wake up after a long tok e nite b4 with my churchmate. (Thanks her for her wonderful advices.) Wanted to reach my workplace on time which i failed to do so recently, n got inspired to work harder. However, the traffic today was horribly serious... Left house at 8am, 8.40am still at my house area.

Saw a lady trying to vent her anger on her bag, which im quite amused by that. She then called someone to let out her anger and started complaining loudly in the bus. At the same time, I could see some of the passengers were kind of being affected by her, while the rest was trying to keep cool. As for myself, I just found it so funny while observing their reactions. I then plucked on my mp3 to listen to my hillsongs so as not to get affected by all. N patiently waiting to get over with the snail-ness.....

I just cant stand slow pace!!! Partly becos of my hobby... I loves the speed... It's really a torture this morning to try not affect my day and overcoming the snail-ness....

Come to think abt it, it's really how we look at things n handle them. If one wants to be pessimistic, everything will be kind of in ur way. But if one wants to be optimistic, everything will be fine. For myself, instead of gettin angry of the situation, i decided to enjoy the motion... Though it's really super slow but it just allows me to slow down for a moment. Which i dun usually have the chance. It's rather enjoyable though.

For Genesis 33:14 says: So let my lord go on ahead of his servant, while I move along slowly at the pace of the droves before me and that of the children, until I come to my lord in Seir.

Spice up maddy

Abit of illness, abit of irritation, abit of blessings, abit of happiness, abit of sweetness, abit of everything make up Maddy... Hehehe... Mus remember those funny funny moments... Wahaha

Spongebob Square Pant really make my Morning.

Waking up in the morning is really terrible for me. When all your family members have all gone out. No Haha (mummy) to wake me up, No Chichi (daddy) to pull me out of bed and No Otooto (Didi) to irritate my morning. The only thing left to get me out of bed is to have a great shock when the phone goes... SPONGEBOB SQUARE PANT!!! However, this Spongebob has saved me from lots adventure from my dreams. Wahaha. Like being saved [tt's im still alive], saved from astonishment and lots more...

Next, you have to apply the 5 steps to wake up.
[Students that have difficulty wake up too, Pls pay full attention!]

Step 1: Rub you eyes (be gentle), let your eyes feel the movement of ur fingers.
*but according to someone it is to rub e dirt off ( sounds correct, but nt fairy tale enough)

Step 2: Try opening your eye. However when u take away your banket off your head n open either eyes, you will realise that it's too bright. So.. cover back ur banket, close your eyes and try it again after 5mins.

Step 3: Yawns alittle to activate your body. If you see someone beside you, pls make sure who is it, n then give him/her a smile to brighten the day.

Step 4: Do some stretching to feel better. However, you will feel lazy, so can try resting for another 5mins.

Step 5: Take away your banket, let your body adapt to the temperature, you will feel abit cold by then, so you can take another 5mins to take away n cover back n take away your banket. Until finally, you GET OUT OF BED!!

Caution: You may either fall back to sleep, or you have to set your alarm earlier to finish all the steps.

AND yes. It took me 10mins (7.15am to 7.25am - today) to get out of bed, not including the time for lai chuan.

Practice makes perfect!!

Colouring your life

Life too boring for you?! Use some creativity to colour it. Need to borrow any colour from me? Jus drop me a text, i'll send you.
*Grin*

The story of The Wall

... Obstacles don't have to stop you...

...If you run into a wall, don't turn around and give up...

...Figure out how to climb it, go through it, or work around it...

-Michael Jordan-

Was Thinkin about the this inspirational quote, and to my creativity, i asked someone to bang the head into wall. Having some discussion abt being burnt or banging into wall. So I came out with an conclusion tt it's more worth it to bang e wall. At least having a 50% chance to see what's over it. Worth it or not who knows.

Every Obstacles in life are jus like tt wall, no one really knows what's over it. That really need wisdom to decide whether to risk it or not. Why not committing every walls to the Lord, He is the one who has e most wisdom, the One who can protect your head, the One that can easily get the wall down, N most of all, the One who knows what's exactly over it.

Just like how He gave Joshua the instruction.

4 Have seven priests carry trumpets of rams' horns in front of the ark. On the seventh day, march around the city seven times, with the priests blowing the trumpets. 5 When you hear them sound a long blast on the trumpets, have all the people give a loud shout; then the wall of the city will collapse and the people will go up, every man straight in. -- Joshua 6:4-5

What He wants is a Childlike Faith and obedience.

He is the One whom Love dispels all my fear.

His strength its what i breakthrough all Walls.

Brother turns 16

Happy Birthday Brother, u r 16yrs n one day older (to be exact)!!
More responsibility, more work load, more of everything. However, may you find joy in everything you do.
This is the year you will make e descision whether to go to JC or Poly, you decide. Watever it is, give ur best shot in everything you do. Cos this is how i always rate myself, even if i dont do well, i know i have given my best.
My hope for you is that u may grow to be a man of God as he guide u thru this phase of life. Do not be worry, my bro, for u have e lord to be with u always.
Jia you for O's, pls dun spend too much time on your computer and pls take care of ur own health. We can be in-charge of that, u r e only one that can take charge.

A short birthday note dedicated to my bro...

Back with inspiration

Finally back to blog again. Sorry for all readers. Haha. Not that im lazy or nth to blog, jus tt i dun really like being stuck infront of e com for too long. As u all know, im a v active person. Hehee...

Tone of things were happening in my life. From work, losing of my beloved grandpa and to be dependent on God. One verse tt struck me so much is : " Dont let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in life, in love, in Faith and in purity." -1 Tim 4:12.

Okie, that's all for e day....

The Run

The RUN.

So happy to be able to go for a after missing trg for abt 2 wks. After all the illness, giddiness and the busi-ness. A thing to cheer for was that, ytd was the first time I went jogging with him. For so long, we had been doing our own trg n never had a chance to run together. So Happy!

Along the run, my mind went wild, thinkin on alot of stuffs.
At pt of time, when im tired I din want to tell him cos I dun want to affect him cos he seem tired too. It's like being in relationship. At time when e reationship seem to be boring but becos you so wanted to continue to be with tt person and finish the run with, or becos U love tt person n din want to hurt tt person... somehow sth like tt [it's complicated]... Haha. So we kept silent. But watever it is 开心就好！

This must be always a start & an ending. You may start the run with anybody. Halfway thru, either partner may slow down or stop. Will you wait for him/her? Or get another person to run the other miles? It's all depend on you. Watever it is 开心就好！However, the next person may not be running at a comfortable pace for you. It's either to adapt, stop to wait for the previous 1 or running ahead to change... Haha. Watever it is 开心就好！

Haha.. Hehee. Toking for so long. Dun really noe wat I tryinh to put across actually. Anyway, for now I still noe tt im still running with yonggie bear. haha...

Jia You to all Tp tracker. Wanna wish all e luck to be with you all during IVP. God bless.

くがつ　にじゅににち　に　ｌれい　れい　ろく　、金　よび

Losing the toughness

After my secondary sch yr... i Started to convert from long distances to sprinting. It's really fun and exciting to feel the speed. Partly becos od the fear to conquer the mental toughness. However, due to my life rountine, i lose alot of muscle n not choice im back doing the middle distances training. The best part is... Im running alone with my shadow showing my running style.

Fri 25/08/06
Training Prog: 2 sets of 10x100m with 100m jog interval
Average time: 20s

Tue 29/08/06
Training Prog: 6 sets (200m stride,100m jog,100m stride,200m jog)
Average time for 100m stride: 18s
Average time for 200m stride: 40s
With addition of 4km jog after that

Though I also wanted to go for a longer distances jogging after since i started working, but i werent allow due to time constrain. However, hearing the news of jogging a 4km was making me mad.

During the run, the only thing i can think of was hatred. Cos im too tired to do that and it was a 10x on the track. There was 1 pt of time i even tried to close my eye to jog but i ran off track. Haha.

Thinking about that, jogging this 4km was like clearing the obstacles in my life, jus that this was physical. And becos im tired of my life that i stop doing some physically strainess activities to enjoy my life abit, however not notice that i also lose my toughness. It's really true that when you can overcome the physical toughness, you will be stronger to face anything in life. Really! I really think that i used to be that tough. As most of my frens know, whenever im feeling down i will do a better long run. This is no longer the case.

I really wanna praise my faithful Father that so loves me that he even provide me with the opportunity to do this run, eventhough i din really pray for it. He knows my heart and He dosent give wat i couldnt bear. Blessed be the name of the Lord.

There is tremendous happiness in making others happy, despite our own situations. Shared grief is half the sorrow, but happiness when shared, is doubled.
If you want to feel rich, just count all the things you have that money can't buy.
"Today is a gift, that's why it is called the present."

Untitled

Din noe wat to give my title as... hehee.

Monday blues, Sunday post sadness.

Wat a friend lor... Said that we go for the course together. In the end she is going with another person. I still keep in considersation that cos she is studying so it will be quite hard for her to plan. Just as I wanted to ask her for her new schedule, she broke e news tt she is going for e course already. Ane e worst thing is... The application to this month course is closed. Super sad la. She still can come n tell me tt there will be another 1 coming up in sep. Harlo U, im always updated to that lor, just thinking for you. I cant believe my ear la.

With wat had happened... my monday is really bluez already. In addition of those comments and responds of THE EXPERTS in the office really ruin my day. IRRITATING. Never fell so down bbefore... All started to comes after 1 another.... So blue. Can it be purple soon... so tt i can see the r a i n b o w sooner.

The End
of the sad sad story

Boredom

I had been slacking in office for 2 days le. Haha... Crazy abt 'Princess Hours' n had been slp late recently. Cant wait to finish it, but my schedule is super packed.. e only time to watch is at 11pm at night. Wondering how am I going to have time trial later when i had such a little rest.

Hehehee.. Jap lesson starting tml. So interesting.

Thanks Kor for coming to acc me for lunch today... So touch tt he came down to my work place to look for me...

mmmm. super boring...

Boredom signing off

Along the way of making an U turn

Wondering why i create this blog for... Seldom get to post anything here... partly lazy (cos i dun really like to stare at e com for so long... unless im playing some super interesting games) n partly becos im not gd at all these.. Haha.. The main purpose of the blog is to share with every1 a bible vs every wk... but recently trying very hard to cope with my life.

I thought im quite an organise person n i kind of know what i want... it seem otherwise. I thought i can be some1 tt's simple but it seem like my Father wants me to be different for Him. Im glad to know that but it's really hard for me.

Things seem to be happening in 1 shot...
Being rejected by NIE
Grandpa down with cancer
juggling with working life n family
Becoming so unfit for competition
Life seem to be in a mess

Kind of having e habit of keeping thing to myself... cos surrounding ppl seem to be too busy with life. N every1 seem to be expecting sth from me. N e only companion i have is only my faithful Lord. Give u praise!!

I dun blame any1. Tt's my life isnt it. No one can plan e route for me. Only myself. Quite of regret why i din even choose other courses in Uni when i can, with a gpa of 3.55. Wat a waste right.

Through this, i really learnt alot n have lots of thoughts abt life. God is so wonderful that He created all these to strengthen me. I really thank Him. God certainly has a plan for me... When He closes the door no one can opens it... n if He really opens the door no one can close it too.

Though i cant get into the course that i really want. It really doesnt matter anymore, at least i know i fought to e v end n tried my v best. Stepping in the society, i learn alot too....

Politics is really v scary. I think my coach is right. She knew tt e main reason I want to study is to get away from politics. Im so stress abt it for wks... though it's not abt me... but listening to others' comments certainly giving me a headache.

Nevertheless, i still like my job. Got to learn quite a few skills... N im in the D&D committee... Got to be involve in some planning too... COOL. I loves to learn new thing!

For the upcoming months... i'll take up different courses which i had miss out in e past due to my packed schedule for school n training. So excited. Looking at e bright side...Maybe e reason of not being able to get into Uni this time is becos God want to create some free time for me.... Going for basic jap lesson on this coming wed... I wonder how it'll be like communicating with my jap bosses with what i had learn... Haha... My aim is also to get a driving licence before i get into Uni....

mmmm.... My yonggie bear going into Ns soon... 26th Oct. I think i will miss him badly. My cute bear going to turn into a even macho bear...

Btw... jus wondering if any1 can help me in the customizing of this blog. Its seem no one can add any tag as i dun noe how to make a link to it... Haha

Signing off...
Kinda long winded today... Maybe rainbow is comming out soon =)