Sing O Barren Sing

Though my first half of 2013 was challenging, the last part was eventful! I am blessed with a new career, many travel trips and a new phase of life. However today agenda is not about my 2013 but it's also along the line of thankgiving.

It has been a long time since I last updated. Here I am again because I'm inspired to share a thought.

"Sing O barren, Sing"

Read again... "Sing O barren, Sing"

"Sing, barren woman, you who never bore a child; burst into song, shout for joy, you who were never in labor; because more are the children of the desolate woman than of her who has a husband," says the LORD. - Isaiah 54:1

Give a thought... How a barren woman could sing with joy when she is infertile?

Could you sing praises to the Lord when your prayers have not been answered?

Honestly, it's hard for me to give praises believing that all will come to pass.

But how many time did the bible proved us wrong.

FAITH

The faith to believe that God knows what is best for you and in His timing.

I am thankful that I learn to give thanks in many little things in my life through the 100day challenge. It make me a more appreciative person and it was a period to train my faith. I would say the reward is more than I ever expected.

If you are going through a hard time now (or for my future self when I face challenge) I hope that you could be inspired to start giving thanks for the things you have and continue praying.

Let me leave you with this thought, would you dance when there isn't a music?

Prayer is the believe that you could hear the music in the future, and faith is the boldness to dance today... 

Hanging my heel

I'm taking a break in between the transition and yes I'm hanging up my heel for my new job.

And I have a new hair cut! 

For those that would like to know, it is a home saloon at Hougang ave 5. I am very comfortable with Pei Shan and over the 3 years she kind of know what I want. In my recent visit I told to make the decision for me because I don't know what I really wanted but just need a cut. So here it is:

Strictly by appointment only. You could contact Pei Shan at 82477136.

Thinking back about my 2 years in this company, I'm really thankful that God has send those friends as angels. It is through laughter and sharing that made my working experience more enjoyable. Thank you for the guidance and the memories!

A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity. Proverbs 17:17

100 days challenge - Gives Thanks day 73 - The Proposal

Cairns where two world heritage sites meet and a place where I found a diamond ring.

On 13 June 2013, the most unromantic boyfriend decided to do something special; to propose at Shangri-La Cairns.

I have nothing to suspect about as it is very common for us to travel together for his race. Something different was that I were extremely busy at work that I hardly have the time to plan any itinerary, so Aaron decided to take over this opportunity to give me a surprise.

What a wonderful joke it is.

It was 4 days after his race; we were adventurous on that day that we decided to go for white water rafting at the Barron River. The day ended pretty fun, tiring and with lots of bruises. It was a rare occasion that he suggested to have a nice dinner to end the day and gave me time to dress up (though I were too tired to dress nicely. *Regretted*).

At North Food and Wines with Sea view

Suspicion arise when the restaurant and bar manager of the North food and Wines, Illy Toloa-Suaniu, brought a bottle of wine, calming that it was the restaurant “lucky draw” and we were the lucky ones. I thought I were over sensitive about things and were embarrassed about myself but I soon put this aside when the seafood tower that we ordered were presented to us. 

Good wine, Good view and a Good ambience

Seafood Tower

 We took our time enjoying the dinner, but I bet Aaron was struggling internally throughout this meal. I reckon it is always a tough mission for any man to pop the question. As for the wine I mentioned earlier, I felt bad not to drink it since it was a gift by the restaurant, so started to drink a few sips while enjoying the lobster, smoked salmon, crayfish and shrimps. It is the best combination I would say. Unknowingly, I drank half the glass and it was more than I could handle. I was feeling sleepy and requested to head back to the hotel to rest.

Before I could stand up from the dining table, the manager has stepped in saying that she has prepared a dessert for us. This was when I knew it is “the moment”.

The specially customized dessert with the ring setting on top with the strawberry 

I saw the ring on top of the customized ice crystal ball and that brought me to tear. Overwhelmed with joy! Aaron was caught off guard too, because North Food and Wines were so kind to help organize this occasion that Aaron only has to do the bare minimum of handling them the ring.

“What am I supposed to do next?” That was his respond, bringing about laughter within my tears.  No fancy speech like he did while emceeing, no animated actions like he did in Sunday school but just a simple “Will you marry me?” and at the same time trying to kneel down with his sore legs. However, all these melt my heart, how could I reject? *blush*

Though no fanciful speech, he jotted down our dating journey in his personalize drawing album. It wasn’t easy to have an endurance dating of 6 years but it definitely taught us how to love and understand each other; and that how we like it, we are endurance athletes.

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. - 1 Corinthians 13:4-7

Thanks to all the friends that contributed the ideas, suggestions and/or simply keeping the cat in the bag. Thank you Illy and North Food and wines for the months of coordination and the surprise. Thank you my fiancé for loving me. Thank God for the angels He places in my life.

The wonderful lady behind the occasion

A special thank you for North food and wines for sponsoring the wine and customized dessert for our special occasion. If you would like to hold a special occasion there:

Shangri-La Hotel, The Marina, Cairns Pierpoint Road, Cairns, Queensland, 4870 Australia
Tel: (617) 4052 7670 Fax:(617) 4031 2815 Email:illy.suaniu@shangri-la.com Website:www.shangri-la.com

To end off, I’m engaged!

100 days challenge - Gives Thanks day 65

God has open the door that I have been waiting for. But I have various concerns. I hope my worries wouldn't hinder God's miracle to happen in my life. Have been praying and till the day comes I'm hopeful and excited. On the plane now to Darwin followed by a 2 hr transit to Cairns. Loves my life, loves what God has provided me with. Off we go again for another race. Flying off in a minute... Bye!

100days Challenge - Gives Thank - Day 19

Yes I skipped a few days of blogging, but I never skipped giving thanks and listening to God.

Life has been peaceful for the week to clear lots of work while the boss wasn't around. I am totally guilty that when life is easier for me, I put God aside, till the extend that I understood the message from God one day later.

While I was queuing up to get my brow threaded, an old lady started a conversation with me. She asked me where I study and so. And she went on giving me compliment after knowing what school I came from. It didn't struck me at that point of time because I feel that I just wasn't up to the standard though I was from that particularly good school. I used to tell people that it is by God grace and miracle that I got accepted by the school and I also once told God that I am a Joke because I feel that I wasn't up good at all.

But God is graceful to me. He doesn't get angry when I told him that I was a joke. God has every reason to put us through something and He always has a great plan for His children. Slow to anger and with love, He uses that old lady to remind me that I am good and don't belittle myself.

I'm always amazed when God speaks. He uses His own creative way to speaks to me even when I don't spend time with Him. He comes to look for me instead. I'm totally guilty but grateful that He demonstrated His loyalty.

Today, I'm guilty once again that I had put God last. Just because my boyfriend has to attend a wedding banquet and no one is around to accompany me and celebrate my birthday, so I decided to attend a church talk. Even though I just wanted to stay at home to rest, I felt that God asked me to get my lazy bum out of my house. Thank God I did! The message was good. Though I was hoping that I could get a word of confirmation from the prophet for my birthday, but I believe the message was for me. Everything that prophet John Arcovio spoken has total relevant to my life. I has to learn to forgive all those people that have hurt me. I have to release them and most importantly to release all the chains so that God could move on to bless me with other things. I guess that was my birthday message. It is very tough but I guess I have to depend on God grace to be truly free. And I know that God had open this door of freedom on my birthday, it is only my choice to enter.

And thank God for bunch today. Boyfriend was totally sweet today. He wake up an hour early to cycle so that he could accompany me for bunch. Thank God for such a wonderful boyfriend.

Time for bed! Boyfriend is picking me up for birthday breakfast before church and sport ministry tomorrow. Will be a tiring day but It will be fruitful!

100days Challenge - Gives Thank - Day 11,12,13

Spend my weekend resting physcially and mentally. Having cell on friday evening, fellowship on saturday night and spending sabbath in the house of the Lord were refreshing to my spirit.

Initially I wasn't sure why I plan to have this 100days challenge to give thanks when I really can't find anything to thank God for. But God has reassured me that this is what He wants me to do. Remembered in Day 1, I was blogging that I am unsure if I will be happy after doing this challenge? but I guess God trying to tell me that, "Giving thanks is an essential to find joy". I don't really understand it now but I'm excited to find out.

in everything give thanks; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you - 1 Thessalonians 5:18

God reminded me that, in days that I really can't find thing to thank Him for, at least (yet most important) I have to thank Him for my salvation. Relentless love was discussed during friday cell and He reminds me how faithful He is to love me even I doubted Him and all His plans. So guilty~ -_-

God is always right and hits the jackpot of my heart when He speaks!

Followed by sunday sermon about the showbread in the holy of holies, I feel that God knocks my head, figuratively, telling me that He provides my daily bread (FRESH BREAD).

And in the process of making this bread, the flour is being sieved 7 times in order to make the finest bread. Am I not making you the finest lady of God?! Another knock! *Ouch! God*

Before the final product of bread is served, it has to go through a baking process with the right heat. Trials are just the heating process to mould you! I feel like just rolling my eyes on God. But I can't admit lesser that through all these unhappiness, I truly know that God loves me alot. And I can't do anything to deny it.

Convicted to attend a bible study after service on the topic on long-suffering, because I truly want to know what God has to say and He got to agree with my self-pity. Yet God closes the session with this message:

Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance.  Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. 

- James 1: 2-4

I guess I need not say anything further why I started this 100days challenges. God ask me to count these as all joy to give thanks to.

God,you have just won the match on the boxing ring with me. Speakless yet at the same time, I thank God for these words of encouragement when I think I no longer can handle anything.

100days Challenge - Gives Thank - Day 10

At the point of breaking.

With all the disappointments that I'm going through, I think I am reaching to a breaking point.
I don't remember when I heard this phrase "God will never give you more than you can handle,” it comforting to know that in the process of moulding, God will make sure that I will be just fine.

But at this very moment, I just feel that I can no longer handle anything.
"An athlete? Endurance?" These are things that people try to console me, but having all the series of bad life experiences marched to you over the years, how long could you handle if you were me? Don't try to judge me. Everyone has their down time and this is just the lowest point of my life.

And I have reached a point where I start to question where is God.

And I guess, God knows. He knows I'm breaking.

He sends me a song, Laura Story - Blessing.

We pray for blessings
We pray for peace
Comfort for family, protection while we sleep
We pray for healing, for prosperity
We pray for Your mighty hand to ease our suffering
All the while, You hear each spoken need
Yet love us way too much to give us lesser things

But God where are you when you hear each of my spoken need?

'Cause what if Your blessings come through raindrops
What if Your healing comes through tears
What if a thousand sleepless nights
Are what it takes to know You're near
What if trials of this life are Your mercies in disguise

What if trials of this life are Your mercies in disguise? God, this will takes great faith and understanding to say this. Please God, help me to see if I'm blind.

We pray for wisdom
Your voice to hear
And we cry in anger when we cannot feel You near
We doubt Your goodness, we doubt Your love
As if every promise from Your Word is not enough
All the while, You hear each desperate plea
And long that we have faith to believe

Faith! God suddenly questioned me with His gentle strong voice "Where is your faith?!, the simple faith that allows you to see the wonderous things I have created before your eyes?" "Do not not lose faith my child."

'Cause what if Your blessings come through raindrops
What if Your healing comes through tears
What if a thousand sleepless nights
Are what it takes to know You're near
And what if trials of this life are Your mercies in disguise

"What if trials of this life are the reason for me to be closer to you my child?"

When friends betray us
When darkness seems to win
We know that pain reminds this heart
That this is not, this is not our home
It's not our home

  
"When it's unbearable anymore and no friends to run to, remember, you have a Father that long to hear your troubles. So do not stop communicating with me"


He knows! He knows I'm losing it all, yet He is still patient enough to love me though I doubted. A love that I cannot comprehend. What a wonderful God!

100days challenge - Gives Thank - Day 9

Mom hair starts to fall and she is panic about her look. Seeing her anxiously picking up her fallen hair hurt me. Her worries has caused her to lost her sleep at night. I feel so helpless and am frustrated not being able to lessen her pain in any way. 

This is the hardest part of christian faith. Seeing love ones in pain yet nothing can be done except to pray and believe that God heals.

Nevertheless,  I'm holding on to God promises.

100days challenge - Gives Thank - Day 8

This is tough. As much as I would like to just switch off my computer and go to bed, I feel the need to blog eventhough I'm experiencing a confused emotion.

There is a time for every season, yet I feel that I'm experiencing winter for the longest time and spring doesn't seem to come any nearer. Caught in the wilderness and direction seem unclear. 

Day 8

Betrayal from friends seem to be very common in my life that I could hardly trust any genuine friendship. Yet tonight, a friend (neither best pal nor close friend) sat me down to share how liberated she was from hatred. This is confusing and maybe i'm too prideful to forgive. How could I forgive a friend that gave me up for money. How could I? 

But God forgives every sins that we committed.

Am I worthy to be loves by God? No. But He still loves me and call me friend.

Who am I to judge what my friends had done me wrong? Nobody.

Who am I to not forgive the person, when God forgives my sin? Total sinner.

Feeling victimize, yet at the same time feel like a total failure and sinner that did not forgive those that had did me wrong.

This is hard. I guess only through prayer that I could have a breakthrough. And only by forgiving, I will learn how to loves more.

Luke 23:43 “…Therefore I tell you, her sins, which are many, are forgiven—for she loved much. But he who is forgiven little, loves little.” And he said to her, “Your sins are forgiven.” (Jesus speaking to the thief on the cross)

Heavenly Father, please help me to forgives so that I can truly understand what you have for me.

100days Challenge - Gives Thank - Day 4

Today I give thanks for Good dinner.

JavaRock Grill House

Location: 681, Hougang Avenue 8, #01-853, Singapore 530681

Spending: Honey mustard Chicken - $6.80

                Salmon - $15~

100days Challenge - Give Thanks - Day 2 & Day 3

Nope I did not give up in giving thanks even though I had a bad day. I am just late in blogging because I was preparing for a presentation. Being betrayed by friend(s) isn't a fun thing to even blog about it. Credit snatching is neither cool to share. But God is faithful.

Day2

Today I will give thanks for the accompany of friends, for good foods and good ambient.

Little Diner at Bukit Timah Road.

God is good. As most of you know, the search for good food and new meal places is like impossible for me because of my busy schedule. But God is good; He provides. I was invited to Little Diner by friend because he knows the owner. The chef is a famous chef from New York, their specialty is burger. It was a shame I did not order that.

Will end off Day 2 with these pictures:

An innovative way - Risotto Ball

Pan Seared Salmon

========================================================================

Day 3

My day wasn't better in any way. But this doesn't stop me in giving thanks in any way too. To end off my horrible day. I got myself 2 dresses and a top from Love and Bravery. Even though they have a warehouse sale tomorrow, they still stay up late for me to visit them after my work. Small gesture like this does help to brighten my day. Thank you.

[Reminder] Will post the what I bought at LAB soon.

100days Challenge - Give Thanks - Day 1

It real hard to give thanks when mom starts to grumble after I came home from a battle at work. Totally understand how much she has to go through, i can only silently let her say what she had to said. Something I could thank God for is that my mom is still not balding though she is into the 7 days of her chemotherapy.

I guess God is faithful and I have no doubt about it.
With the start of this challenge, God prepared something really special for me. 

I have just received a result that I have been waiting for and I was so surprised that I could pass the test though I thought I had done badly. This test is rather important to me so that I could move a step closer to my dream. 

Thank you God.

But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. - Matthew 6:33

100 days challenges - Give Thanks

As human, or rather myself, is some caught up with the unhappy things in life which prevent us to give thanks to simple things that has brought us smile on our face.

Life has been tough for me. Boss has been using nasty words and mom has been diagnosed with cancer.

Grumpy has been with me for days and more disappointments come hitting my way.

I gonna stop this.

To be happy is a choice, so I'm challenging myself with this 100days of Thanksgiving. I'm not sure if I can complete this (I'll try) and I may not know if I will be happy after this but at least I know by starting to be conscious with what God has give me is an important step. Because Life itself is the first gift that I should Thank God for.

Being a athlete, I hope to chase this God given life and escape from this tiring life. May I start to be thankful for little things in my life.

I will praise the name of God with song, And shall magnify Him with thanksgiving.

- Psalm 69:30